Media campaign for new racket; Roddick to endorse

Guadeloupe is home to a number of exotic insects, but the most pervasive is the ordinary mosquito. It is a constant battle to keep one's flesh from being a mosquito's next meal. One quickly finds that a whole range tactics is necesary to keep the mosquitos at bay. Sleeping under a mosquito net, spraying mosquito repellant on the extremities before going out at night...But these are all passive means, designed to protect oneself from bites. After the torment of incessant itching, and the hideous aftermath of spotty splotchy skin, there is a strong desire to strike back.

The best weapon in the arsenal for an offensive is the mosquito racket. I did not know that such a thing existed until I came to Guadeloupe. Its a plastic racket, similar in appearance to a tennis racket. But instead of netting, there are thin conductive wires. With a push of a button on the handle, 3 V of electricity shoot through those wires, effectively killing any mosquito who should be so stupid as to try and bite you.

I must admit that I thoroughly enjoy seeing a mosquito fry on the wire. After I've zapped the mosquito the first time, I often press the button a second time, for a few seconds more, just to be certain. Sometimes, the carcass smokes a little. Afterwards, I simply blow the dead mosquito off the racket out the window, in the garbage, etc.

Its not expensive (about 10€) and its not incredibly difficult to use. Much easier than catching them with bare hands (Don't laugh. Before I had a racket, that's how I was fighting this war. I got pretty good at it). Advanced hand-eye coordination isn't necesary since the ratio between surface area of the racket and the mosquito is about 200 to 1. Though, care should be taken not to touch the live wires...3 V may not be much, but I assure you, it stings.

I've come to regard my racket with much affection. So much so that I feel it deserves more recognition, better PR. If people only knew how good these things are, I am certain mosquito rackets would be the next hottest accessory. All that is necessary is a smart-looking spread, and maybe a celebrity endorsement.